I knew I was an empath when I was a young girl. When I would cry when I saw homeless people, homeless dogs, homeless cats, movies with homeless people in them. For some reason (and I am sure it has to do with a past life occurrence) I have felt a special energy for elder men who are in need of support. Maybe it’s because my biological Grandfather which whom I only knew as “Uncle Leo” lived in a run down trailer, had few but important visitors, no “family” and a smile that always lit up my heart. There was something about this gentleman that made me wonder and I didn’t know why.
Fast forward to a couple of weeks before he passed. He called me and said “you know you’re my granddaughter” and I cried and said “I know, I love you”. Although I wouldn’t trade my “Pop” for all of my lifetimes I wish I had a lifetime to get to know Leo…This is one of the very many empathic parts of my being.
Now let’s forget that scenario for a moment and throw in someone who simply hides and manipulates things from you, lies to you, tells you things like “you are crazy” or “grow up” because you believe in something they may not. Narcissistic tendencies? One could or would think so but I do NOT believe that makes someone a “Narcissist” I don’t even know how comfortable I feel with labeling someone a thing because I believe every human being has the tendency to take on “Narcissistic Qualities” such as lying, manipulation, lack of empathy, egoistical etc. I truly believe the people that have these qualities that lead us to calling them narcissistic are just lost beings stuck in their own traumas from childhood. They surely aren’t born “narcissist” so who are we to label them?
Now bring us back to the empath in a 3D world. Or an empath in a world surrounded by people with unresolved traumas. That may lead us to believe that we are surrounded by narcissist when in reality we are taking on the energy of those said people inside of us and we feel it ten-fold because we are such empaths. We generate, they project. Our light can alchemize their traumas, their dense dark energies, their feelings and emotions..but at a huge cost to us as humans in today’s “world”. It can be truly tiring to always be the ear to listen, the body to alchemize, the space to process but it’s a job we chose in this lifetime and a job we will continue to do until we can share our light willingly with those “narcissists’ in such a manner that their energetic make up is reprogrammed into that of light as well.
Did I lose you yet?
I just feel the “narcissist” jargon is thrown around so loosely and anyone can make up the archetype of a narcissist if they want to; that’d 3D living- duality. Yes and No. Right and Wrong. Black and White. When in fact we can live in a realm where we can just be in the present and not worry (but that is the teachings of the Buddha which we could contemplate all day) and not peg people for their traumas, in what we believe to be there manipulations, their inconsistencies and their lies. It is all truly perspective. I could tell you all of my partners were narcissistic, heck I have even been called that at times by people, and truth be told, I was working through some of my own shadows and traumas and yes I exhibited some of those qualities that people identified as such, but am I to be labeled as a “narcissist” because of those moments in time where there was a lapse of healing in my spirit? Absolutely not.
I think the same for the label “Empath”. I believe we are just light beings with open energy centres and intuition that are able to take on the feelings of other beings around us so strongly that we are labelled “empathic”. I think we are just evolved spirits from other times that have that invisible connection through our history and internal energy centres that allow that connection; it is an exchange of energy. So maybe when we identify others as having a quality with a negative innovation that is just an energy exchange from us to them and then we identify that mirror?
These are all contemplations that have arose through my last couple of months of healing, awakening and doing my own shadow work. I have been quick to identify such qualities in others, but hey, maybe those were qualities I was feeling inside from some space in time or maybe even during that moment and it was something I needed to work through. Instead of arguing when I feel this way, I have made it a goal to find stillness in that moment, quiet…and to listen to what I feel inside and dissect that through mediation, art, journaling, writing or just playing like a child with my children at times. I play with crystals, holding them, warming them up, I sleep with them next to my bed, around my neck; they adore multiple places in my house and that I feel is to alchemize the energies that come up even within our own living space. They all have different attributes to them; different… powers? Our children love them, they give us a sense of calm….a sense of magic.
The world Is such a diverse place right now. People are truly living in different timelines. I know this may seem confusing to some and that’s okay, you will get there when it’s time. If you have questions or want to connect, I will have a private studio opening up to have these open discussions, maybe some round table talks with women who are interested or by all means through a 1:1 mentoring conversation. I am not a magical being that can change your world but I have evolved over decades of work, through education, learning, and furthering my practises in this world and with that came the magical power of connection and that is what I can offer you…
This was a post to make you think. Maybe it will evoke you to write, or contemplate. It is here to help you ask questions about your own conversations and thought processes; nothing more, nothing less. But either way it is here for you to alchemize this energy you are feeling either way….this was also a post for Leo… because I know.. and you know and that’s all that needs to be said. I say that with a smile….and I feel your energy all around me at times so thank you I wish I had gotten to know more of you on the physical plain but now we have all of the time in the universe…literally.
I love you and goodnight.